sereneharmony.com

Inner Peace is characterised by a sense of inner calmness and tranquillity and an absence of stress, tension or fear. You may experience this when you totally absorbed in doing something you love, like watching your favorite tv program, reading a book or walking in beautiful countryside with the person or people you love.

Inner peace and happiness are inexorably linked: inner peace is the true source of happiness. Happiness and any other emotion are states of mind, so if we are at peace within we will find happiness regardless of our outer circumstances. Conversely, we may have all the apparent luxuries but if we don’t have inner peace then we won’t be happy and won’t be able to enjoy them.

Here are some tips to help you find inner peace and happiness:

• Allow people to be who they want to be. This means don’t try to change them to be the person you want them to be. It’s incredibly difficult to change people and who’s to say our way is any better than theirs. Focus on what you like about them, what’s good about them and you will find these things increase. Be more patient with people – you’ll receive the benefits by retaining your inner calm!

• Meditate often. When you are meditating, you are achieving the highest state of inner peace, and this will set you up for the rest of the day. The benefits to your day of this make the few minutes spent on really worthwhile – you will feel at ease with yourself and the world and much more positive and relaxed.

• Accept the world the way it is. Although there may be frustrations, disappointments and irritations, most of these are out of our control, so the best thing is to allow our environment to be the way it is and keep a positive attitude inside. Rather than trying to change the world and the people in it, be determined to remain happy. Everything can be a positive learning experience. Here are some tips for a positive thinking attitude.

• Don’t be jealous of other people. Perhaps they have the kind of house you want, or have the perfect partner, but jealousy only harms you by upsetting your inner balance. And you never know – they may not be happy within, or may have hidden problems of their own. They may even be jealous of some aspect of your life – your personality, your looks… who knows! Forgive and forget. Resentment against people is one the biggest detractors of inner peace. Someone may have said or done something to us once and yet we let it fester for weeks – years even. Sometimes the person doesn’t even know they have offended us and we are the one poisoning ourselves with the resentment. We need to forgive and forget and we will remain peaceful and serene.

• Take responsibility for your life – don’t be a victim! This ties in to the previous three points – if you let something or someone outside of yourself affect your sense of peace, and blame that for your lack of happiness, you are becoming a victim. Don’t let that happen – you are in control of your destiny. To a great extent you create your own world, so create one where you are determined to bring only good things into it.

• Spend time with positive and cheerful people and avoid negative people or people who complain (victims). They will lift you up and show you how it’s possible to enjoy life and look on the bright side.

When we are faced with difficult situations, although we usually view the situation as the problem, our experience of the problem comes from the mind and the negative feelings we have about it. By responding to the problem or difficulty with a positive frame of mind we can use it as an opportunity for growth. Suffering, pain and unhappiness are all unpleasant feelings which exist within our mind; by purifying and directing the mind to a more positive place, we can achieve peace and joy. I remember once being stuck on a train that was held up for over an hour just outside of a station. People around me were stressing and fuming and complaining, but there was absolutely nothing that could be done to change the situation, so I just absorbed myself the book I had with me and enjoyed the chance to read and relax. If I didn’t have a book with me I would have used the opportunity mentally to repeat some affirmations to myself, or would have closed my eyes to meditate. Although I got home later than I had hoped, I arrived relaxed and calm.

To attain true and lasting happiness we need to develop a habit of seeking peace of mind. This can be done by the spiritual practice of avoiding negative states and instead focusing on positive and uplifting states of mind. The more we focus on this, the more permanent our inner peace will be and the more happiness we will find.

Read the Serenity Prayer.